Cumming Reviews

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Our Team

Lars
Lars
Reviewer

Former Swedish heartthrob Lars is brain child behind Cumming Reviews. Lars came up with the idea after slipping and bumping his head while standing on his toilet to hang a clock. The idea came to him in a vision he had after being knocked out. Lars says its the “flux cumpacitor” that makes CR porn review possible. Lars wishes he could travel back in time to meet a young 70’s porn star Seka.

Aleksandra
Aleksandra
Reviewer

Aleksandra is an aspiring nude model who hails from Russia. Don’t be fooled with her cute, innocent, school girl looks. This perverted girl first discovered hardcore porn in her parent’s bedroom. Aleksandra has one rule on a first hookup date with men … “I tell them that I love to swallow!”

Leo
Leo
Reviewer

Leo has been a professional student for the last 20 years. He holds a Masters in Masturbation.  Leo is working on his PHD in Perv and is gaining transferable work experience as an intern reviewer. In Leo’s spare time, he volunteers as a food critic at local peeler bars.

John Barron
John Barron
Content Contributor

John is our only senior and a connoisseur of fast foods. John is known as a stable genius with a photographic memory. John says, “I bet most people can’t repeat ‘cock pussy person camera TV?'” John has a real talent for spotting big breasts on a “stormy” day. He says his 3rd wife and daughter have tremendous tits, so strong and powerful that they can withstand a caravan of cum blasting at them.